Feeling Judged

7 Apr

Parenting is a tough job.  You Moms will respond with a sigh “I could have told you that.”  Long hours, little to no appreciation, worries of failing your children.  It’s the most important job a person can ever take on.  Parenting is raising a little person from scratch.

If it’s so important, why aren’t we supporting one another?  Why is there constant judgment on other parents?  Let’s recognize that we all love our children and are parenting at the best of our abilities.

There’s constant judgment on other parents. I experienced so much of it while working at the chiropractic clinic–my boss and I (who didn’t have kids at the time!) would constantly judge parents.  I was a much better mom back then!  Oh, you co-sleep–that’s why your child isn’t sleeping.  Oh, you mean your child is in a crib by himself–that’s your problem right there, he feels abandoned.  Your child has a flat head, he’s never going to be okay.  You vaccinate.  You don’t vaccinate.  Your child is sick again?  Why would you have more children if your first is so willful?  How dare you spank your child!  Homebirth–you’re so irresponsible!  Do you realize how dangerous it is to give birth in a hospital!  There’s constant battle between working moms and stay-at-home moms.  Why aren’t parents supporting one another?   Is passing judgment easier than offering a word of encouragement if we have all been there?  It doesn’t mean you can’t have an opinion.  Oh, I have my opinions and I share them.  But I hope people know that I support them in their parenting.

We don’t need to know one another to show our support.  We can give a nod and sympathetic smile to another parent struggling with her toddler at the grocery store.  We can make ourselves available to other parents–especially once our children have grown out of the difficult stages.  We should be surrounding one another with encouragement and support.  Not judgment.

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One Response to “Feeling Judged”

  1. Brynna April 11, 2011 at 10:10 am #

    Becca,

    Thanks so much for your comment!
    And thank you for this post — I’m not even a parent yet and I already fall into the trap of judging others’ choices about their children.
    “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” (1 Thes. 5:11)

    Brynna

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